Besides the various St. Patrick’s Day articles (How to Make Cornbeef and Cabbage, Best St. Paddy’s Day Bars, Old Navy Promoting Drinking in Children Under 13–okay, not really), the other big story was that those fake Ugg boots are bad for your feet. Someone has discovered that the knockoff Uggs can lead to a lifetime of foot deformities, backache and pain in as little as 6 months. I haven’t read anywhere any specific brands, but I’m guessing it’s the ones that look just like Uggs but are half the price. After all, just the short ankle style is around $150.00 (yes, I have considered buying them so trust me on this one).
Booooo knockoff Uggs. If you can’t trust your feet in an imitation boot than who can you trust? Well, I’ll tell you who and here is my handful of fake stuff that I swear by.
Fake Purses and Handbags
Most men don’t understand the concept of great handbags and even some women don’t, but I can tell you for a fact that there is liberation in carrying around an expensive purse. If you’re broke like I currently am, there’s a little liberation along with the feeling that I’m fooling the whole world when I’m carrying a fake designer purse. Select a good one though, don’t go for the ones that have the designer’s name misspelled (a Brada or Louise Vuitton, for example) pick one that is as close to the real thing as possible. Quality is still important anytime you’re spending even a penny of your hard earned money. (Note: I think it’s illegal to sell fake purses.)
I am guilty and probably should be locked up for wearing fake and costume jewelry. I rock cubic zirconias and occasionally mix in gold plated junk. If it doesn’t turn my skin green and is pretty I don’t care and no one knows. If they do, they don’t ask. A good rule of thumb though is to mix in the fake with the real and again, quality is still an important factor. I highly doubt that the Dollar Store sells any jewelry that anyone over the age of 5 should be wearing and even then you’re taking a chance on products laced with poisonous lead and cadmium. You certainly don’t want to die because of fake jewelry.
Fake Toys and Gaming Systems
My daughter wants a Wii and my relatives suggested trying out the fake Wii at Walgreens. It’s not really a fake Wii, it’s just an offbrand gaming system which hooks up to the television and includes little handheld waver things for playing games. I bought one for $25 as opposed to a $200 Wii. The point in this was not to trick my daughter, she knows very well what a Wii looks like, but to gauge her interest in it. Why even consider a $200 gaming system if she’s going to play with it for 10 minutes and forget about it? Which is exactly what happened with the fake Wii. Of course, part of that was because of the effort required in figuring out how to make the wavy wands work, but it still helped me realize that she wants a Wii because someone else has one. Not because she really wants one. Not yet anyway. I would suggest trying this with any expensive toy that a child is interested in before spending the money.
Why would I spend any money on any real art when I don’t understand it in the first place? I’ve found that a really great frame can make a scribble scrabble of a poster look like something important and costs almost nothing. I took an art class in high school in which we had to carve something out of a block of something and mine (with the help of the teacher) ended up in the shape of a duck. I proceeded to paint the duck brown with every color swirled into a circle on both sides, it was hideous and may have contributed to me being the only person in history to fail high school art. Anyway, my mom had that duck set up on a doily and a neighbor actually asked to buy the stupid thing, thinking of course that it was some kind of important “art”. Art does not have to be expensive. Beauty can actually be quite cheap and meaningless. (And you can quote me on that.)
Fake Leather and Fake Fur
PETA’s going to love me for this, but fake leather and fur is not only friendlier to the animals that provide leather and fur, but a whole lot cheaper as well. I will say that when it comes to shoes, fake leather isn’t the best idea especially in shoes that require bare feet, and you know what I’m talking about. I don’t own any fake (or real) fur but that’s only because my lifestyle doesn’t require fur and I’d actually look silly going to Walmart with a fur coat on. I do have coats with small ornamental embellishes of fur that are of course fake and as far as I can tell is still just as ornate as if it were real.
Considering the fact that the fake Uggs can cause foot deformities for a lifetime and most of us need our feet for mobility, I’d have to agree with the warning and stay away from them. This also goes for fake Hamburger Helper as well. If you have to have it, sometimes real is worth paying for.